To laugh often and much

This post is for the sole purpose of moving the stool chart down the page and out of sight :) And it's a nice thought for a rainy spring day when I am blessed with the use of only one hand and half a back...

Have a good one!

The Scoop on Poop

Nasty, hey? :) We had the Official Version of this chart posted in our Report Room on the Stroke Rehab Unit where I worked last year. Every morning, it stared me in the eye. We were encouraged to use the "types" in our documentation of patient's bowel movements so that we would have objective descriptions.

It wouldn't be so bad if it didn't talk about FOOD at the same time!

Good golly, I don't miss that unit.

So for all of you who keep daily diaries to show your neurologists/doctors, I proudly pass on the chart for your personal use :) Won't your docs be pleased?!

Cause I'm a W.O.M.A.N.

Yup, that time of the month. Move directly to dark chocolate and do not pass GO. Put on your safety goggles or get out of the way!

Streakin' (for MS!)

I'm going to have lots of explaining to do... I'm wearing a bright new color for MS.

It's kind of scary for me, actually. I can either tell people it's a mid-life crisis or actually explain that it's in support of the Walk to end MS. Some will know that I am struggling with neurological issues, others will be left to think that I am just a "participant". In for a inch, in for a mile!

It was a fun afternoon at the mall, though. Good to see old friends and make some new!

My kids are teasing me... we heard on the news a while back about how Montreal was having problems with rabies outbreaks in the wild animals of the city. The city would capture the wild animals, check them for rabies, and if they were clean, they would be spray painted with a pink stripe and released.

"I am officially rabies-free!"

Now the MS, on the other hand...

I guess, other than the hair, the limp from the 3-day muscle spasm (spasm seems like such a *gentle* way to describe this ) in my calf and foot might give it away... ouch. I have so much respect for those of you who have been dealing with MS joys for years...

But at least I'm still smiling!

Another silly nursing cartoon

OK, I know that's not funny to anyone who doesn't spend their days assessing breath sounds and looking at hospital gowns and openings of all sorts :)

It's been a busy week at work. 3 patients on my team passed away, and one ended up with paralysis from spinal cord compression. I am caring for a wonderful lady who is the mother of one of my children's school-mates. She is very strong, but her diagnosis is horrible. It's hard some days to leave work at work. I really connect with the patients and families on the unit. Others drive me absolutely up the wall, lol. I am so glad to work with such a great team where we can laugh and cry together every shift...

It seems like I was the "go to nurse" for family emotional issues this week at work. I need to recharge my batteries...

Maybe it was the fact that I was operating left-handed due to a dead arm (nerve stuff)... I think that I appeared half-human to other people who know suffering.

At least what I see at work makes my life seem pretty darn cooshy!!

The Valley

Our music therapist at work was singing this song to a palliative patient and his partner the other day. It's a beautiful song with wonderful words, and I wanted to share it. So here's to my Blogging Friends and to anyone else who just needs it! The song is "The Valley" by Jane Siberry (another one of our Great Canadians).

I live in the hills
You live in the valleys
And all that you know
Are these blackbirds

You rise every morning
Wondering what in the world
Will the world bring today
Will it bring you joy
Or will it take it away?
And every step you take is guided by
The love of the light on the land
And the blackbird's cry
You will walk in good company

The valley is dark
The burgeoning holding
The stillness obscured by the judging
You walk through the shadows
Uncertain and surely hurting
Deserted by the blackbirds
And the staccato of the staff
And though you trust the light
Towards which you wend your way
Sometimes you feel all that you wanted
Has been taken away
You will walk in good company

I love the best of you
You love the best of me
Though it is not always easy
Lovely? Lonely?
We will walk in good company

c. 1989 Wing-It Music

My Secret Super Hero

Because she takes a lickin and keeps on tickin... And because *nobody* can beat those glasses!!

To our Garage Sale Queen and Secret Super Hero... Shauna at bugs, bikes, and brains gets the award of the day!

Wordless Wednesday

I'll Show you Mine!

Catz Mews has tagged me with the "I'll Show You Mine" meme where I have to take a screenshot of my desktop for you all... So here goes!

I love this duck Momma's crazy hair do -- she looks just like me on any given day ;-) And all those little ducklings riding along...

I am tagging:

Crazy Cath

bugs, bikes, and brains

Pass it on!

(Does meme actually have any meaning?? Anyone know?)

Bonafide Dog Lover

DEAR GOD FROM THE DOG

Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?

Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?

Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the "Chrysler Eagle" the "Chrysler Beagle"?

Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog?

Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?

Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good dog.

1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.

2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.

3. The Litter Box is not a cookie jar.

4. The sofa is not a 'face towel'.

5. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.

6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.

7. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying "hello".

8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table.

9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after.

10. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.

11. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch.

12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.

P.S. Dear God: When I get to Heaven, may I have my testicles back?

And then comes the Fall...

I am having a no-where kind of day. I want to be sad about this morning, but I want to ignore it even more.

I fell down the stairs. And I did it with Olympic skiier finesse.

How could I have been standing at the top, talking with the kids about the phone one second, with no intention in the world of actually *going down* the stairs... and then two seconds later be all akimbo at the bottom??

At least I didn't drop the phone. Nope, wouldn't want to harm the phone!

My left leg has been buckling a lot lately. I usually catch myself or grab onto something. And I know that I have been a little extra careful around stairs for the last few months because my depth perception is wonky and I get mixed up and swoon.

So my leg buckled, and of course, I went DOWN instead of backwards. And mistreated every joint in my body along the way.

My tail bone and elbows, and ankles are like screaming pixies. My neck has seized up and stubbornly refuses to obey right or left, up or down. And my left shoulder... gets worse by the hour in spite of a whack-load of anti-inflammatories. It's throbbing, and I can't move my arm backwards or up to my head. I've seen a lot of rotator cuff injuries in my time... and I'm scared.

And embarrassed. And feeling bodily-betrayed.

Have any of you dealt with stuff like this? Any advice?

Sorely,
Shawna

Know your A,B,C,D's

Thanks to Linda at Brain Cheese, I am reminded that I will be booking my yearly mammogram when I go for my yearly check-up in a few weeks.

I can hardly wait...

Such cold, hard, squeezing, and they always like to get me to hold such strange positions to get just the right angle. I feel like an orange that has just met the semi-trailer tires.

Then to make matters worse, there is always the biopsy and draining of my "little mouse", a collection of cysts about 1-inch by 1-inch. I'll take a lumbar puncture any day over this, thank you very much. Especially after last year's over-zealous resident fought with the ultrasound technician as he poked and prodded and drained for *45 flippin minutes* while she gave him advice and heck and apologized and cried.

But seriously, I'm over it...














Now for the training run for this year's mammogram:
EXERCISE 1:

Open your refrigerator door, and insert one breast between the door and the inside of the refrigerator. Have one of your strongest friends slam the door shut as hard as possible and lean on the door with lots of pressure for good measure. Hold that position for five seconds. Repeat in case the first time wasn't effective. Insert the other breast and repeat the instructions.

EXERCISE 2:
Visit your garage at 3:00 a.m. when the temperature of the cement floor is just perfect. Take off all your clothes and lie comfortably on the floor sideways with one breast wedged comfortably under the rear tire of the car. Ask your husband, boyfriend, or whoever is up at 3:00 in the morning to slowly back the car up until your breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled. Switch sides, and repeat for the other breast.

EXERCISE 3:
Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Have the stranger press the bookends against either side of one of your breasts and smash the bookends together as hard as she can. Repeat for the other breast. Set an appoinment with the stranger to meet next year to do it again.

You are now properly prepared for a mammogram.

SERIOUSLY ! Mammograms do NOT hurt. These exercises are just to make you smile. If it's time for your mammogram, run, don't walk to your phone to schedule an appointment. It may be the most important phone call you have ever made.

Even if it's not October... It's *always* breast awareness month! They're kind of nice -- let's all do what we can to keep them!

Wordless Wednesday

Nap Time. My 6yo son, Owain's, toes. The only time they're still!

"Orange you glad you don't have MS?"

This post made me laugh my little RRRRse off:

Brain Cheese: An Unsuspecting "GUEST" Blogger...

Linda, thank you for the Smiles! I'll take a dozen of "them shirts"!!

'cause you got Personality!

Meet my Sweetie. He's a burst of sunlight... an Orange personality all the way. Bouncy wouncy trouncy pouncy fun fun fun fun fun like Tigger. Problem-solver, resourceful, loving, light-hearted, and playful.

Me... I am, or was a year ago when I took the test at work, a blue-gold. I'm all about relationships and responsibility. I am becoming more orange, though... I am taking life much less seriously since having kids with incredible senses of humour, dating a big goofy bunny wabbit, and working on a Palliative Care Unit. My deepest needs and motivations are changing and focusing after dealing with new health challenges in the form of MS.

What are you? I'd love to know what makes you tick!
S